Taking Responsibility

"Its not you, its me."

I think finally I have made a breakthrough in my poker lessons. Its not poker that continually screws me over, its me.
This latest realization came to me after another head-scratching call from an opponent in my monthly home game.
Said person is actually a very good poker player, not easy to read and smart enough to think through calls, so when I say monthly home game don't take that to mean no-skill.

The situation is this: Early in the tourney, I get A-Qo in LP. Villan raises 3x BB to 150 t$. I re-raise to 4x his bet 600 t$. Usually I never re-raise unless I have a huge hand (a leak) but he just flat calls. Im thinking A-K but could have a big PP.

Flop is raggy 9 high no double suit, we both check.

Turn is a Jx, he checks. I could my chips and betting the pot will leave me short so I push. He tanks. Immediately I know he has A-K for sure. He asks for a count of my chips and its going to cost him another t$1400 (3/4ths his stack) to call. And he does.
River is a blank and im out.

My first question to myself is "do i really bluff that much?" And im pretty sure that answer is no. Im pretty tight, even weak-tight but not bluffy. So why is it I can't get players to do what I WANT them to do versus what they should do?

If I ever answer that question I think my poker breakthrough is not far behind...