Eagles safety Brian Dawkins was clearly distraught after the Bengals game and had this to say in the postgame press conference about how tying felt to him: "It's like in 'Talladega Night' how they say there is only first place and last place." Let this be the latest reminder to you that sports are not to be taken seriously. Sports problems are not real problems. Dawkins was visibly upset and what came to his mind was ... "Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby." If in your darkest hour, you quote lines from absurd Will Ferrell comedies, you have a blessed life. I mean, it's not often a person is called to the morgue to identify a loved one and tells the medical examiner: "It's like in 'Anchorman' when he says: 'It's a formidable scent. It stings the nostrils. I'm gonna be honest with you, Brian, that smells like pure gasoline.'"
T.O. = B.O.
Maybe He Could Work for AIG, He Has an AIG-Style Grasp of Numbers:
Asked about being 0-10, Detroit coach Rod Marinelli snapped to a reporter at a news conference, "I am not 0-10; you are 0-10." Maybe you've got to be in serious denial to work for the Lions. Overall, Marinelli is 10-32 as a head coach. Sorry, you are 10-32 as a head coach.